Fear Free Spree

This is the post excerpt.


I stood in front of the FDR memorial and read the quote inscribed in granite, “The only thing you have to fear is fear itself.” It sounded great in high school and looked even better on a monument. My question now that I am older is, is it true? Fear is sometimes just there to protect us and to keep us safe. However, there is a time when we must take flight on this journey to live our lives. Anxiety tries to keep us from experiencing the adventures that could be a wonderful part of our experience. I am not sure about just fear itself but I know I fear a lot of things, even if mildly. This blog is my journey to have some fun as I overcome some of my everyday fears. I may be uncomfortable and talk in run on sentences at a rapid rate when I feel awkward or extremely out of place even if I am trying to look extremely chill. Finally, there are those things I avoid doing out of everyday fears that seep into my life. I do not want to live in any spirit of timidity but to live a life where I thrive. Where will this road take me from my decided assignments? Ultimately, I am not sure, but starting this blog is me stepping out. Now onto finding these everyday fears that I currently avoid so you can follow along beside me on this journey. Please feel free to send me your thoughts.

#thriftyregifter #leahporter #anxiety #wellness #mentalhealth #everydayfear #fearblog

Lost in the Dark

I went for a hike with enough time to get back to my car before dark. Before I began, I checked the map and knew the trail was marked. Beautiful night and the features on the trail were not disappointing. It was right in the middle of my city so I could hear cars driving by. I took photos and was in my happy place.

But then a hiking fear began to become a reality. The trail was not ending, and I felt like I had been walking beyond the full 3.1 mile length of the trail. The trail had loops for biking that were not clearly marked. I was literally walking in circles. And then the marker: color of the trail I was on, pointed to a rocky stream and I was definitely confused and admittedly lost.

At this point, I was anxious and upset. I was frustrated at myself, the trail, and anyone else I could think of. However, I knew better decisions could have been made and I was my anxiety was more inwardly focused as I feared my embarrassment of these inadequate decisions that led to my predicament.

Yep. It was dark but something clicked. My flight response turned to fight. I started thinking. Used my flashlight on my phone and just hiked it out of there in the dark. I was not a victim but a survivor with a story I was determined to live to tell. I made it. My 1998 car looked like a luxury vehicle when we were reunited much later than expected. I found a fear fighter out there in the dark. A fear fighter ready for my bed.

#fearblog #fears #hiking #nature #outdoors #trails #lost #lostoutdoors #thriftyregifter #leah #porter

Veg Platter Please

I remember a time that I feared ordering in a restaurant. Anxiety overcame me when I started to say what I would like, but with practice and more outings I became more brave. So brave that I not only love eating out as a treat but tasting cuisines around the world. This Vegetarian platter is from an Ethiopian restaurant and it is my top choice there even though I eat meat. This is what I call traveling on a budget. So far I have been to India, Thailand, Italy, Jamaica, Lebanon, Mexico, China, El Salvador, Japan, Philippines, Greece, Ethiopia etc. Traveling through cuisine. The interest leads to cooking my own versions and studying the culture further. Fear has truly ended up serving me well, once I let go and was willing to order and take a bite.

#foodie #restaurant #fearblog #anxiety #newthings #adventuresinfood #ethiopian #cuisine #traveling #thriftyregifter #leah #porter #leahporter

The Answer is Solo

The city I currently live in is not a super large city but slowly growing in social options. However, a few things stopped me. Ironically, I thought I did not fit into the crowds at the places I found interesting. Another common excuse was that I had no one to go with. It has seemed difficult to find people that want to do things that aren’t busy with their families or existing obligations. I felt a little anxious but I went out into the great unknown on my way to a trivia night. They allowed me to be placed with a team at random. I am finding this much easier to plan my social life like this: either joining with an event where all are welcome or offering others an invitation into an event such as this where it makes no difference whether they accept. No need for a lot of planning, just to have their plans changed or cancelled, and me disappointed without another option. I participate regardless. Bravely, I opened my door to eventually walk into the event. I knew I was facing several fears and I fought the mental battle. I did not allow myself to let negativity creep in. Yep, I felt I over dressed, as most people were in jeans but before I let it make me feel less, I turned it around into a positive. I remembered the wise words from a friend. She said “Maybe everybody else is underdressed and you just look awesome.” The night progressed, it was enjoyable. So I walked out the door solo, and came back in with joy, a few new friends and a night that was full of some laughs. Oh, and I won sixth place, in style.

#fearblog #fear #overcomingfear #anxiety #socialscene #socializing #trivianight #trivia #mindset #overdressed #makingnewfriends #nightout #solo #thriftyregifter #leahporter

The Not So Swanky Swan

It was a beautiful day of hiking in the snow. If I had said no to that adventure then I would not have seen the most beautiful swan land on a near-by lake. It was breathtaking as it approached for the landing until much to my surprise it started flapping its wings and extended its web footed landing gear. This graceful creature made a very ungraceful landing. It made me think of my journey to set aside fear and accept joy through adventure. My landings sometimes look a little clunky but this is my time to live. Live despite the imperfections and grace life by showing up. Transforming into that swanky swan who goes in for the landing because it is worth the time spent on the lake.

#swan #swanlanding #transformation #beyourself #fear #fearblog #lake #fears #fearblogs #thriftyregifter #leahporter #leah #porter

Roll Away Roll Away

The everyday things that we fear can be vast in the extent of the fear and the nature. Meet my foam roller. My foam roller I bought but had not used. My excuse mainly centered around the fact that I had never used one before. This gives me an excuse to be concerned and keep it in my closet until the next garage sale when some optimistic healthy hopeful comes waltzing in. Right? Well unfortunately, I am facing the everyday fears and opening up my life to the things I have been avoiding. Down to the floor I descended to do four moves. I wasn’t sure what I thought at first but I was trying. Trying to figure out how to get it rolling and position myself correctly. Here I am in position one which was not my favorite. I found it awkward.

However, I rolled on and on and on into three more positions. I liked my shoulders the best and felt tension releasing in the sides of my upper legs. Just proving to myself that it was doable and that this was not impossible was a key win. I was indeed capable. The knowledge gained that you are powerful enough to do something you fear a bit will lead to the next thing and the next. Onward I roll.

#fearfreespree #fearblog #leahporter #exercise #foamrolling

Turnip With Pizza

If you turn up with pizza, you have a lot of friends. If you turn up with turnips you may lose friends. I remember a day when I did not know how to cook and feared adventure in the kitchen. I am challenging myself to be more well and take risks with food. Everything on this pizza is either a vegetable or prepared at home from natural ingredients and I was quite scared it had the potential to be awful. In the end, it made for a tasty bite. They were more filling than bagel type pizza bites as well as more satisfying. One thing being, I knew it was a positive choice for my health. I sliced the turnips (2) and seasoned them as well as added a little olive oil. Then I added a homemade sliced tomato that was cooked and seasoned with garlic powder, onion powder and Italian seasoning to taste as well as thickened with potato starch. Topped it with some favorite pizza veggies, and finished it by topping it with a nutritional yeast and cashew milk cheese sauce that was also thickened with potato starch and had seasoning in it such as salt and garlic powder. This cooked on 425 degrees in the oven for about 20 minutes. I “cooked” so unfortunately no exact measurements. However, I put that first bite in my mouth and was pleasantly surprised that my veggies were disguised. I had succeeded. It would have been easier to shy away from the adventure and go buy a pizza but I know a few more kitchen tricks, and a new recipe. So now I just might make a turnip into a pizza and deliver it to a friend.

#fearblog #leahporter #fearfreespree #cooking #turnips #pizza

Walking for my Supper

I recently moved to a more urban location with walkable access to most essential day to day needs. You know the ones you don’t think about often, like food. Proudly, I told people that I planned to walk to locations around the area to get things I needed instead of driving. It has been over a month and I had not walked to anywhere farther than the dumpster. Honestly, I even drove to the apartment office to ask a question. My fear was very valid: humidity. Walking to the grocery store brought up a few everyday fears. I am American so people will be driving by and will see me walking, the overall distance, the most giant of hills, and carrying the items back all made me cringe a little and delay my good intentions. Milk may be considered a staple but it is also lighter to transport in my vehicle. With determination, I went over the giant hill and off into the sunset never to be seen or heard from again. Of course, I am joking, as I am here writing this safely from home. Exercise was natural and had a purpose. After all was said and done, it was good to save the environment and go by foot for my milk. Actually, slow down enough to remember my re-usable bag. The hill though, hopefully I can forget walking back up it by next time I need milk or I will at least appreciate my need for bread more. At times, I have wondered if I could rely on alternate transportation completely. My anxiety meter points to not yet or never on that one but this blog is a process of letting go of fears and discovering the adventures that unfold in the process.

#fearblog #fearfreespree #leahporter #walking #groceryshopping #greenliving